Wednesday, April 30, 2014

The last one for NaPoWriMo 2014!

Clearance Rack
My box of flowers is planted in the sun
I like the ones best that I rescue
The clearance rack a six pack for $.75
It makes me feel like I’ve won
I plant quite a mixture
This year I’ve separated out one
Amongst the throng to be the odd one out
I spy that dramatic purple pansy
Sitting there amongst the small forest of fuchsias
Or the one deep wine geranium
That sits as the parent presiding
Over all the tiny violas yellow, blue, and orange
I think, "why am I singling out this one?"
Because I feel I have become singular
Or my circumstances or my child’s
That I can no longer stand with the group
I am a flower, but such a different hue
My son is too
And that is the glue
That binds our hearts
As we grow
Planted to stand out
Even though the others are glorious too
We are not like them
We are not like each other
But we are all complimentary together
Making the whole garden
More unique and even more beautiful

Tuesday, April 29, 2014

A Tiny Twofer Tonight....

Walks like a Duck
Little costumed duck
Speak to me
You look like a super hero
The “Green Lantern” of ducks
There you sit
Reminiscent of floating in a sea of innocence
You are wearing a mask
Black pinprick eyes
Fixed on nothing and no where
You don’t look like you could rescue anyone
Rescue me please?
From talking to myself in the midnight hour
About a boy that used to read to me

Admired and a Maze-D
Judgments are part of us
A daily part of our lives
No one knowing the fuss and muss
That has crawled inside and died
We hide it all
Not knowing who to call
Who to present
The root of it
Began as a seed
A clamorous need
You say there are walls
Keeping others out

I construct mazes to keep it all in

Monday, April 28, 2014

It's late tonight....

I had a really awesome beginning of a poem about dandelions in my head as I was gardening this afternoon. I hope that comes back to me, but for now....

Hearing the Call
Even in the silence
Of late night sitting
Before bed, but after
The hubbub of life
Filters to the bottom
Nothing switched on
But my thoughts
My space heater empty hisses
The faint ringing in my ears
Of nothing, but that high pitch
That I have to concentrate to notice
The soft clack of the computer keys
As I type to take away the aloneness
The not so distant busy main road
With police sirens or a fire truck
The consistent thrum of motors
An ambulance racing to the hospital down a few blocks
A wrong number ringing of the telephone
That shatters this solitude
Every few months
In this I hear you
You sit lit up in my mind
My heart a constant throb
Rising to the top
I am buzzing
Working the sweet memories
Vowing to call
Not now it is so late,
But when first light comes
And the world stretches
I hope the noise
Doesn’t drown out

My desire to hear you too

Sunday, April 27, 2014

Image again....

Some nights it is just whatever I’ve heard roaming in my mind in the ten minutes I get to sit and write a poem. I heard an old interview with Daniel Radcliff about how last Halloween he roamed around New York with an Elvis mask on and how wonderful that was for him to do that. There is a Harry Potter mask hanging up on the wall of my office that I love---it is from Italy. It is the only non-carnival-like mask that is on my wall and it got me to thinking.

If Elvis Could Have Taken a Walk
I am drawn to masks
I’ve heard that they are a bad thing
To hide behind something you are not
What if the mask is more comfortable than being unmasked?
What if it is you, the protection you seek
Or the anonymity that isn’t yours because
Everyone seems to know your business even before you do?
To walk around with something beautiful you construct
That distracts from what is raw and healing
Blemishes ripped away by your own hands
And to cover, you pick up your mask
As to not frighten those you meet
Especially people you’ve just now met
And want to get to know better
You can walk around with your mask on
Being who you want to be
Or a character you have always admired
A mask so adorned with jewels and pearlesque paint
Feathers floating around eyes that do not lie
Eyes that see out and no one breaks in
Except to guess what is behind
Those interactive, enticing eyes
When you arrive back at solitude
The mask comes off and is hung
On the wall for you to study
Each line, jewel, and fantastic feather
How to match what is underneath
With this beautiful portrait
That gives you total freedom

To truly be who you are

Saturday, April 26, 2014

Sharp moment....

I wrote this just after midnight last night. I was about to sign off for the night and I decided to check on someone on Facebook. My feed came up right away as it always does and a status update of someone that posts all the time was first in line. He is an actual real-time friend and I wanted to see what was up. What he wrote was mixed in that it was a hard memory mixed with reason to praise that wasn't were he was a year ago now. I had heard a bit of the story before, but this time it was the whole thing. It struck me hard in the space I was all day back in my own thoughts about past events. I was happy for him, but sad for me and wrote this poem trying to convey how I felt. Many hours have gone by since I wrote this and I'm feeling much better now, but here is the poem.
Standing on the edge
My toes hanging off
I look down, further than I’ve ever been
I cough and nearly topple into the cavern
Smooth straight down
No secret holding up these walls
It is written on my face
In my eyes
On my breath
I remember each step that brought me here
To ride that slide to the edge of the envelope
I pushed and punched my way through
Stopping before the fall
Just short of breaking all
I take a deep breath in and wiggle those toes
Those hang so far into nothingness
No foothold
No branch to catch on the way down
Just straight to the bottom, Baby,
I’m still here looking before I leap
Looking for the way out
It is uphill going back
And empty going forward
I know I cannot fly
I cannot get over this chasm
I wait, looking at my feet
They are gripped to the sandy soil
So small and claw-like
Curved and clutching
I must wiggle those toes some more
To feel the blood pump
Up to my heart
Up to my brain
To find a way out
I see it now
A narrow path
To my right
I cannot see around the corner
But I will go
Wiggle once more
Say goodbye to the abyss

And find out what lies ahead

Friday, April 25, 2014

Happy Arbor Day!

My son told me it was Arbor Day today. I didn't even notice. So he thought we should plant a tree. I thought this was an excellent idea, so we sought one and bought one. Nothing else on my mind, so why not?

Red Leaves in Spring
Maybe I’m more like a tree
I don’t think about what trees do
They are there
Cleaning the air
So my son says
They are important
When he puts it that way,
I agree and then think about
How vital they are to me
They feed my eyes
Restful. The trees soothe
My whole being just seeing
All of them in rows
Wound in the woods
Wandering free among the trees
They shelter me and so many
I breathe deeper the further I walk into
Great groves of them standing firm
Finding my heart in them as they sway
To the raw rhythms of the earth
The trees form a choir of comfort
A gang of glorious perched preachers
Whispering scripture’s very essence
Witnessing of the Almighty’s hand
In each sapling they sing
A song so simple and sweet
They are there
Do we notice?
Planted a tree today

And it felt good

Thursday, April 24, 2014

Too much of life on Facebook I'm afraid....

Making Space
A shiny worn spot is on my space bar
My keyboard calls out to unseen friends or foes
I would go see them by getting in my car
To shake hands and listen to tales of joy and woes
Yet I sit and answer them in typing
The thought of calling even throws my balance
Anymore it isn’t so much to my liking
Somehow the face to face meeting is a challenge
Or so I think and think too much
Running from making dates
It is only a lunch
Not my ultimate fate
Perhaps the space is necessary
To be a well-worn groove
To take friendship seriously
Making real connections to prove
There is a bond that will go on

What have I to lose?

Happy birthday Master Shakespeare!

Drat! I did push publish just as my computer said midnight. I wrote this for the 23rd. My yearly attempt to write a sonnet.

Well Past Two
Foreswear late nights gone from my loving bed
Repose with me a while as dreamers do
I know you hold on tight to common led
Of work that drives past your desired coup
I long to get ahold of you once more
And bounce to bright arrests of awe be bound
A stroll by our lush languid lilting shore
Strikes a tingle to my toes and then
Converse of all our wants for so much more
Press now into each other’s curvy bends
You do fulfill my soul, my dearest friend
Implore your will do not leave love’s seared seal
Sung sweet surrender eases now our mend

Swerve not from chamber secret hour to spend

Tuesday, April 22, 2014

Happy Earth Day!

Ode de Erda
Robins fill my yard
Digging down in the dirt
They will not starve
Plentiful rain brings worms inert
How they feast!
Scattered grey goons
Dissipate for a chance to relate
To the shiny faced loon
this melts spring’s heartache
Beaming golden strings
warming the crust
Bees practice buzz and sting
As birds sing full of lust
The lake is teaming eggs
From nesting and wriggly fish
Birdwatchers and fishermen make a wish
Downriver the bears stumble from dens
Fox, deer, and raccoon cross icy water
Following the river’s dips and bends
Handing over new structure to the beaver and otter
The rocks push back at rapids
Slimy with moss and lichen
Tiny bats eek, “we are not yet rabid!”
There is a purity not yet syphoned
The earth’s core hums and pulls
With a strength known by no man
For all that is stored
Runs like hourglass sand
How large is the glass?
Will time win out?
We pour over the past
“For the future!”, we shout

Monday, April 21, 2014


Photo Shop
I look in the mirror and think, ”Who is that?”
She looks distantly familiar as my memory of her
Is more vital and vibrant then what I see here
Away from the mirror talking with my people
Those who know what I’m talking about
And listen and we exchange deep longings
Or likes of what has shaped us
I know she is beautiful and bursting with life
I don’t need to look in the mirror
When I see a recent snap shot that someone
Shows me to ask if they can post it online
For all the world to see and I say yes
Even though there is that woman I don’t recognize
Her lazy eye drooping down
Her tired face smiling
Yet dug down dried out
Puffed out is more like it
She stands there insulated
With more lard then a Southern pork pie
Protected from the barbs
Wrapped up in bubble wrap
So as not to break when bumping into walls
Or ceilings of glass 
or ones made from her own fresh fears
She makes me mad to see
I don’t like her much
This outside stuff that makes her portrait
Of the moment, but not how she feels
I pick up an old photo of time gone by
One where my hair is curled just right
My smile is energetic and eyes wide to the world
I'm not fat or too thin,
I am radiant with confidence
And alert looking for that next opportunity
To stand on my soapbox and sing!
I like her
I want her
I desire to see her again
I’d like to chat with her
Well, I do
But she seldom talks back to me

Sunday, April 20, 2014

Easter 2014

I've been trying hard to put into poetry something wonderful I witnessed today at church, but can't yet. I'll keep at trying as I had a beginning sentence that slipped away today. Lesson here is to capture these things and write them in the moment. Here are 3 poems that came as from fragments of the day. Not quite expressing how I want to say it, but a start.

Ringing in a New Dawn
Today it was supposed to rain and it didn’t
There was blue sky and sunshine
Today we made careful plans not to be late
We were late as so many times before
Today it was predicted we wouldn’t find a seat if late
We found one and then were moved to an even better one
Today we thought it would be a good service
It was better as we were surprised by God’s infinite grace
Today we thought no one would come to dinner
You came and we laughed again
Today we usually make holiday meals complex
But we made it delicious yet simple
Today was supposed to be the same as last year
But last year was left behind and we made a new day today

What is resurrection?
It is insurrection?
Pilgrims that claim
A bombing in His name
Is it new reputation?
Reimaging or station?
To resurrect the body from cold
Warming up the eternal soul
It is only one time
This is the spine
Jesus was raised from the dead
Grave clothes left on his bed
He burst from the tomb
He is coming back soon
Soon is a relative term
It makes some squirm
I have learned to wait
A constant state
He took my place
So I might see his face

Patty Cake
I first saw a baby boy
You so filled with joy!
Telling all you knew
He was growing too
Then I didn’t see you at all
The boy was growing tall
I’d glimpse him from time to time
Wondering what made him so fine?
To you, I didn’t know he had changed
To me, I saw so little, but a new bounce in him
Every ounce of him was something I couldn’t name
Then I had a baby boy
I was so filled with joy!
I was telling you too
You looked a bit unglued
No matter, I thought you were scattered
Absorbed in so many moments and your son
I thought you needed more fun
I didn’t know it weighed a ton
My baby grew
The time flew
I now stunned
Missing his fun
Your boy, I would describe
As eyes missing a vibe
I know that missed cue
To you I flew
We held a bond
In this growing pond
A secret language between you and me
It had come to rest exacting a fee
From our children we cherish
Fearing they would perish
Without hope
Without a vote
Lacking everything
In our beings
We hold hands
Across this span

Molding them 
into stronger men

Trying Haikus

Today was wonderful in that I got to not only hear our Washington State Poet Laureate, Elizabeth Austen read some of her poems, but some other local poets as well. It was an event at one of the local libraries. I even participated in reading a couple of my own poems during the open mike portion of the program. But I didn’t hear but one person do any haikus. Her haikus were pretty brilliant, I had to admit.
I’m late posting this again tonight because I was challenging myself to write in that style---the haiku. I am not really comfortable attempting it. Some people think the haiku is easy to write, but I struggle with it. Here are my twenty minutes of attempting the genre. I’m sure some of you are much better at this then I am. Leave me a haiku!
Traditionally they are 5-7-5 in syllables, but there was a web site claiming that is not the case in English anymore that syllables don’t really count. I took that to heart with some of them.

Tomato plants reaching for sun
Call to me
I plant early

Fluffy pealed trees
Signal goes for spring
Yielding to frigid rains

Smell of brownies baking
Walk by the lake
Remind me swimming comes

Come God Almighty
Take away world’s mighty sin
You are much stronger

Held up by my love
Before I was born he came
He overcame grave

Sending sun’s rays back
I knelt down and felt around
Where the arrow fell

Looking down seeing
More is forgotten this hour
Starring at my hands

Rough patches on feet
Examines my heart speaking
Rub some lotion in

Slice through pain piercing
Look beyond the horizon
Bird wings its way free

Forgive me now
Hand placed on face tenderly
Turns to warmth again

Spring Blood moon rises
Thin, wet grass shutters in wind
Gaping ground swallows

Round wrinkled eyes soft
Place needle in hand to thread
Pull through missing once

Jesus treads not hard
Slides over donkey saddle
Braying covers cheers

Held tight in my arms
Place scraped out permanently

Round in a square hole