Act 2
SCENE 1
(Everything is exactly as we left it at the end of
Act 1)
SARAH
Ladies, please. Drop
them now, s'il vous plait!
GABRIELLE
This isn’t real. This can’t be real! Je vous salue, Marie
pleine de grâce….uh….uh…Amen!
SARAH AND SOPHIE
Amen!
GABRIELLE
They are still here!
(SARAH pokes
her with her sword)
Ouch! It is real.
SARAH
Are you sure/ we are awake? It seems to me/that yet we sleep,
we dream.
PEARL
Who are the weirdos?
SOPHIE
Qu'a-t-elle dit ?
MARIE
Il n'est pas grave.
What matters is that we find out why we have been summoned.
PATTY
As I keep saying, no one
called you. I don’t know where you came from but… wait a minute… What do you
think, Pearl? Is this all part of the final?
PEARL
What?
GABRIELLE
This is madness!
SOPHIE
Qu'a-t-elle dit?
MARIE
Silence! Are you part
of the Alliance?
SARAH
I could run them
through with my sword.
PATTY
Now look here, I’ve
about had it! We demand you tell us what is going on here!
PEARL
You go, Patty! Be the
man!
GERTRUDE
No, I’ve tried that, and
however pleasant it is in private, it never works out in public. Though it
does look like times have moved on a bit since I tried.
MARIE
Silence! Ces américains
never know how to be good prisoners.
PATTY
Who do these people
think they are?
PEARL
Prisoners? Now, look,
we have rights!
GABRIELLE
You have no rights in
France. And “these people” are France.
GERTRUDE
There is no there
there.
PEARL
Patty, this makes no
sense! We should leave.
PATTY
That’s the first
sensible thing you’ve said all day!
MARIE
Non, leave, you speak
with authority, but ignorant. We want to know why you have summoned us. We have
ways of making you talk!
GABRIELLE
She is ignorant.
PATTY
Hey!
GABRIELLE
They both are.
PEARL
Hey!
GABRIELLE
It isn’t an insult; it
is a fact. You are not in your own country. Do you know even one of these
women?
PATTY
Who cares who they are?
GABRIELLE
Tourist! You were
probably just here to see Jim Morrison, like all the other Americans who come
to Pere Lachaise!
(GERTRUDE, SOPHIE, AND SARAH gasp)
SOPHIE
Qu'a-t-elle dit?
GERTRUDE
I don’t remember him at
my salon parties.
SARAH
No longer mourn for me
when I am dead
Then you shall hear the
surly sullen bell
Give warning to the
world that I am fled
From this vile world,
with vilest worms to dwell.
(GERTRUDE AND SOPHIE gasp)
MARIE
Oui, yes, old news. Old
news. Moving on.
GERTRUDE
Well!
PATTY
Since there seems to be no end to the living dead people tonight, I figured they were part of that group. But why are they on the rise? I thought they were just part of our…
GABRIELLE
Aha! Part of your what?
PEARL
No, no, no, I’m sure they haven’t seen Janis tonight!
GABRIELLE
You’re what? Tell us.
MARIE
Yes, tell us.
PEARL
Patty, don’t!
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