This
poem is about a lot of things right now I’ve been going through and yet about
my past also. Things I’m always learning. Written 11/5/2013 after a tough
rehearsal night with a new script.
Reconstruction
I
am so aware of what is hers and what I’ve created around it
The
shaky form that held within its promise
I
was drawn to it, barely knowing what it was
All
I knew is that I wanted back in
I
wanted to return to doing
To
being a part of a family
That
I’d dropped out
Become
a distant visiting soul
Dancing
on the fringes
Of
a group of people
I
admired
So
I waited to come
To
hold again a map
Returning
me down that road
With
bumps and winding
Meanders
past deep lakes
That
I dive into with eyes
That
cannot see past
My
own nose
In
I plunge
This
time over my head
Drowning
in words, limits, and love
Struggling
in the undertow of dramatic construct
Deconstructing
what is there to layer over top
A
canvas to make this boat to sail
Fast
across that lake
Not
weighted down to sink
On
the bottom
To
skim slick across the top
To
get somewhere
I
get out at the other shore
Walk
down an unknown path
To
a golden sun
Burning
hot against those hills
Rising
emerald green gems
To
turn dark blue with cold
As
the sun downs behind them
Leaving
me alone
Look
up, you say
She
is gone
Above
you are the points far off
That
say you are not alone
That
guides the boat
Who
brought you to the path?
Gave
wind to fill the sail
Warmed
by the sun and marked it
Going
out behind what seemed so green
And
then silent black blue
And
you were frightened in that silence
Until
you turned your eyes away from the depths
Or
the storm
Or
the path
Above
you is an expanse
That
goes on and on and on
There
is no limit
To
the gift of grace given in this moment
You
are not ever alone
