It
is spring. Our weather is changing minute by minute with temperatures running
the gamut and the rain coming in all sizes with intermittent sun. Our Boy is
tied to this up and downs of spring. Snapshots of our month so far:
Tuesday, May 2: He fought us
in a monumental fight over something small that turned huge lasting for hours.
I wrote a poem about it and exhausted I fell into bed.
Friday, May 5th: We sent him
off to visit his middle school even though he’d been picked up twice at school
that week on high alert and anxious. We spent all day at his new middle school
and it was a fantastic day! He had no issues. He talked to another boy about
autism and the boy he met was autistic and told him about middle school from
his point of view. Our Boy participated in classes and took it all in and when
he’d had enough he told us and calmly came home. He was all sunshine and roses
this day.
Sunday, May 7th He was a
stinker all day. Just not cooperative, but then consented to getting out of the
house and going to the most unlikely pick for a movie, Hidden Figures, and he loved it. He even leaned over and spontaneously
gave me a kiss on the cheek during a moment there was a little “romance” on the
screen. It was sweet.
Tuesday, May 8th: He came home
and loudly proclaimed, ”Mama, I had a flawless day!” This is what was written
on his report too. He was so proud of himself. I was so proud of him too as he’d
written a great poem about the scientists from Hidden Figures. We’d had really great discussions about it. And
then the boy who used to yell loudly
that he did NOT write poetry to find out that he’d written a poem mainly about
Katherine Johnson and how brilliant she was and how hard it all was but that he
admired her. I gave him loads of kisses!
Saturday: He was calm,
but tired. He said little, but wouldn’t do anything. I don’t think he moved
from the couch. He told me to go away and leave him alone. He was surly and a
grouch.
Sunday, Mother’s Day: He wrote me
the most beautiful 5 paragraph essay about who I am to him and what he notices
about me. I am still glowing about that one. I will keep it always. He went to
church. He was kind, but stubborn still about some things. He was trying hard
to make it a good day for everyone. He did destroy something nice in his room
when I had to go to a meeting, but at least it was his property and not
something of mine (I did give it to him at Christmas). I guess that was my
added bonus mother’s day gift that for a change he didn’t destroy something of
mine.
Yesterday: He talked
enthusiastically about becoming an airline pilot. But by bedtime he’d changed
his mind as he was looking up all kinds of diseases earlier in the evening. He
said, “Mama, I want to be a doctor that helps people in developing countries.
They need a good doctor to help them survive as so many of them die of curable
diseases!” His big heart was showing as he talked about getting people that
needed it safe drinking water and medicines. I told him that is a wonderful
ambition and if that is what he wanted or to be a pilot or a combo of the two,
we’d figure out how to get him through all the school and things he needed to
become one or both of those professions. This made him happy. He lectured
himself to sleep talking about all the good he would do.
Today: I had been
home about ten minutes when the phone call came for us to come to school to get
him and hopefully calm him down. We got there to witness him kicking his
teacher and fighting two others. He’d been at it a half an hour by the time we
got there. He collapsed into my arms
sobbing, red faced, sweaty, and defeated while Martin spoke in hushed tones
with the teachers and principal. They weren’t mad, but worried. We all are
about this. It was sudden.
He
couldn’t let something go that happened, as far as we could tell once he spoke
about it a while ago, maybe even a couple of weeks back, when we picked him up
the first of the month. He can’t let go of it as it is against a fellow
student. The teachers were protecting that student and then our Boy from
himself. The student is fine as they got there in time, but his teachers are
worse for wear. He’s out of school tomorrow. We hope that helps reset whatever
switch in the weather. We’re talking him through it and trying to change
whatever processing that he’s struggling through.
It
is supposed to sunny the rest of this week past tomorrow. I hope that is the
case and our Boy will follow suit. One of his past teachers called him “Sunshine”
as his nickname. He is every bit that when he wants to be or feels free to be
that and every bit as loving. So many people are charmed by him. I am. He is
our “sunshine” even on a cloudy day.
